Does bed wetting when you’re younger connect to a love for diapers or being babied later in life? Does the diaper lover who grew up with wet sheets feel differently about loving diapers later in life than someone who didn’t?
I’m not sure I have an answer to this one. But one thing I’ve noticed is that for some people, training ‘problems’ or medical issues earlier in life shifted from being something they were shameful or humiliated by to something they came to love and feel is part of who they are.
This isn’t true in all cases, of course – I also read or hear about guys who have had to wear diapers much of their lives, either at night or all the time, and while they say they’ll never “love” wearing, they came to accept it and have found a culture and community online that accepts them.
But what about the diaper lover? The person who, through no fault of their own, had problems keeping their bed or pants dry.
Sometimes this happened to them when they were a little older – the 11 year old who suddenly has an ‘accident’ and wets his shorts, or the 14 year old who wakes up to a wet bed. These can be one-off things….humiliating maybe, but put behind eventually, although the memory can live for a very long time.
But for the teen boy who finds that the wet beds are more frequent, the path from being “normal” to being a bed wetter can be abrupt and painful. Maybe there’s a medical component. Maybe a physician says it’s psychosocial. Maybe there IS no answer – but the wet sheets continue.
There can be sudden changes in social behavior. No more sleepovers. Maybe no invitations over just to hang out – the boy worries that there might be a lingering smell in the room or that ‘hanging out’ will lead to sleeping over.
Depending on the parents, there can be calm reassurance that this is all very natural, or there can be scoldings: “Why don’t you grow up”….as if growing up might not be connected with the issue.
Underpads or plastic sheets might be used to try to prevent mattress damages.
And, eventually, the topic of ‘protection’ will come up.
Yeah, diapers, and it doesn’t matter whether you call them Pull-Ups, Goodnites or Underjams, they’re still diapers, at least to a teen (a 7 year-old might buy the line of it being “just like underwear” but a teenager won’t).
Now, wetting the bed is one thing, but in the rare instance where this extends to the day, even if it’s an occasional thing, the feelings can be painful: friendships are hard to maintain, gym class becomes an exercise in embarrassment if the boy is wearing hidden ‘protection’, or if he ISN’T wearing protection, worries about having an accident can become a major preoccupation.
Plastic pants might enter the picture – but the crinkle sound and the risk they might be seen probably doesn’t make them much better than wearing Pull-Ups.
Maybe there are one or two friends who know and don’t care, but I suspect this isn’t usually the case.
Often, as the boy gets older, the protection isn’t enough. The sizes are slightly too small or the wettings are heavier, there are leaks, and it’s time for true diapers, tapes and all.
Now, somewhere along the line, for some people, all of the awful stuff turns into something else. Either the phase passes or continues but in both cases the boy grows up and for some of them, the diapers have become something he secretly ENJOYS wearing.
What was once embarrassing is now embarrassing but for a different reason: who’s he going to tell that he actually wants to keep wearing his diapers?
I suspect that it’s more common for someone who had to wear “real” diapers with the tapes and padded bum to enjoy them later in life. I think there’s something about the protection and safety which, while humiliating at first, gave a kind of comfort. These feelings of safety when combined with other physical changes in the boy’s body provide a connection of diapers to protection and care, even though they might not be ‘cool’ with the other kids.
Maybe those feelings of protection and care help to translate into wanting to extend that feeling, maybe that’s why some DLs also become ABs or, at the very least, secretly want someone ELSE to be changing them and caring for them, to be there for them in the morning and give them love and attention and be proud that he had a dry bed but a wet night, and happily change him or cuddle him for a bit while he remains in the wet diaper.
By extending the feelings to receiving care and security from a caretaker or daddy can shift from being someone who once had a problem to being someone who has discovered that his problem is an advantage: he can let someone care for them, not judge him, keep him safe and diapered, and realize that his diapers were and are just part of who he is – and that everyone deserves some acceptance and love.
But what about you? Did you start as a bed wetter and move into diapers? And how do you feel about them now? Maybe your sharing will help others to understand.
11 Replies to “From Bedwetting Back to Diapers for the AB/DL”
It’s great to see a blog from a “Dad’s” perspective!
Your post really struck a chord with me. I’m a 27 yr-old “boy” who had an interesting start back into diapers. I wasn’t a bedwetter, that I can remember. When I was 19 I was involved in a bad car crash. Long story short, it took me 6 months to learn how to walk again.
The morning after the crash, when I woke up in the hospital, I was catheterized. At the time I didn’t know what that meant… it was days later I realized there was a weird tube coming out of me there. I was cathed for maybe 4-6 days, after which the nurse helped me out of it and explained I would need “adult briefs” as I couldn’t make it to a bathroom, and was too “out of it” on morphine to use the bedpan reliably.
Being a cocky 19 know-it-all, being put back in diapers (by a hot male nurse, no less!) was NOT fun at the time! In fact, it was humiliating. I remember when family and friends came to visit I was mortified they might notice I was diapered under my gown.
I regained my strength and am now 100%. But for a good year after I healed I kept remembering being diapered in the hospital… how it felt being diapered, being changed. I began to remember it positively, though I was confused by my feelings. One day I finally got the courage to go to the drugstore and buy a package of diapers. And the rest is history!
i love diapers.
trying to remeber when i frist like diapers.
when my sister and brother were still in diapers all the time i would waite until every one was a sleep at nap time and go get the cloth diapers and plastic-pants and put them on, that’s all my mom would use on us 24/7 when we were little baby’s in diapers. i never wanted t o be out of diapers during the day, at night my mom would diaper me for bed, in the morning befor anyone got up i would go get the diapers and wear them. my dad was never around or in our lifes at all. only came around once a year if we were luck. one day my dad came home and found me in cloth diapers and plastic-pants and beat my butt for it, and when i wet my bed as well. i would wet my pants at school so i would get sent home, so i could be diapered in the day time. i did get paddy traned the day wetting and only had a few acc. at times art night. when we were all out of diapers, i would go to my friends house were i new that’s there sister’s or brother’s were still in diapers i would take them and wear them when i went home. as i got older i would baby set kinds still in diapers, just to make money and buy me more diapers to wear. then when i couldn’t baby set kinds, i would go to my friends house and take there diapers home with me. my mom moved around a lot from state to state looking for my dad. and never found him. the last place we saw my dad is ca. and i was 10 yo at the time. so my mom moved us away to arkansas and that sucks, to her family they never new us or wonted us around so my mom moved once again some were in arkansas. i love the sound when you have the plastic backing diapers on and when your in plastic=pants and have cloth diapers under them.
wow! its like u were telling about me when u wrote this. it was like looking in a mirrow or reading a story about why im like i am. i wonder how somebody who doesnt really love to wear diapers can understand all this stuff about kids that do. u sure seem like the perfect tb “daddy”.
because i always had to wear diapers so i wont wet the bed, i have wondered how i could have learned to love them so much too. maybe its because it was like the only special attention i got from all the other kids in the foster homes where i lived. i just knew it really felt like love when someone was really sweet to me when they had to change me. i loved that special attention and it was like the best thing i had to look forward to every night. when i got one foster mom that totally hated me for being a bedwetter it seemed like all the kids there were mean to me too. i tried really hard to learn to stay dry so i wouldnt get a spanking for it, but that was not what made me feel so bad i guess. maybe it was because it felt like no body loved me that hurt the most. when i finally ran away from there, and they put me in a new place where my new mom was cool about having to put diapers on me, it seemed the kids there were cool too so it made me feel like it was special when i got extra attention at bedtime. getting wrapped up in diapers was like getting a special hug that the other kids didnt. it really messed up my mind when i got puberty and my mom didnt want to change my diapers any more and made me learn to do it myself. it felt like she didnt love me as much any more and i felt sorry for myself because of it. i didnt want to grow up any more. i wanted to go back and be a baby again so she would love me again.
when an older boy that was my best friend most of my life started offering to help me change my diapers when we had sleepovers, it started a new “love” thing about diapers. i thought the special attention he gave me was love too, but i finally figured out it was really something else. i wish i had somebody that really loved me like u said, “someone to care for him, not judge him, keep him safe and diapered, and realize that his diapers were and are just part of who he is – and that everyone deserves some acceptance and love.” just like u said that, its how i feel too. im glad i found somebody that understands kids like me and helps me understand myself better so i feel better. thanks for being a great online dad.
Wow, daddy you are describing me.I grew up with wet sheets and no love from my parents about it. My family just left it in my hands to take care of. There were lots of times that I woke up soaked and had to find a warm spot on the floor to keep sleeping on. I always woke up wet and no one offered me diapers. My Grama gave me some Depends once and they made me feel so safe and secure. I soaked them and they leaked but my bed still was mostly dry. When I wet at home mommy just told me to wash the sheets. I only washed them once a week so my room stunk and I smelled. There were lots of evenings that I had to wriggle into cold smelly sheets. I never got scolded or spanked, it was just my problem to deal with.
Then I got older and moved out. I discovered the diapers and the protection they provided. I felt safe and secure again. Oh and I didn’t have to wash the sheets every day either.
Now I sleep in thick cloth diapers and plastic pants so I don’t leak. I love my diapers.
as a teen i was never put in diapers if i wet the bed whihc i did most nights i just had to sleep in it wet cold and smelly so got used to it but i would prefer now to be put into diapers at night since i still wet the bed now
Thanks for having this place to visit… Its good to see there were other boys (LB’s) who had the same night issues …bedwetting. I was 9 when my parents decided to put me back in night diapers. I didnt get much attention otherwise except when I was in trouble…and being put in night diapers was different. The attention wasnt because I was bad but to help me stay in a dry bed. My mom seemed to in ways take care of me becasue she seemed to be kinder telling me I was still her little boy. I was a bedwetter to my teens and wore diapers till then.
I was put into a babys diaper at my aunts during the summer when I was around 7. She thought I wet my pants because of what my cousin told her. I was in the living room with my aunt and cousin and my aunt went to the hall closet came back with a diaper and said looks like if you wet your pants you can wear a diaper. My aunt pulled down my pants and smacked by backside once and said lay down. She pulled off my underwear, lifted my legs and put the diaper under me and taped it on. My aunt kept my underwear, she stood me up and put my pants back on. My cousin stood in the room the whole time and when my aunt left she said baby has to wear a diaper.
I went tn live with a foster mom when I was eleven, she told me straight away I was to be put in nappieq and ‘rubber’ pants at night . I told her I didnt wet mysekf but she just smiled and said ‘ I know what naughty boys get up to in bed at night’ The first night was so embarassing having her bath me like a toddler then put baby cream all round my pee pee and bottom, then the thick nappy and the final humiliation of standing to and stepping into the plastic baby pants. She made sure I had accidents as she didnt allow me toilet access once my nappy was on, and at weekends it would be ten o clock before she changed me. I hated the time I spent with her.
I totally agree with U.
I didn’t have the same problems that everyone else is describing, when I was a child I knew from a very early age that I loved diapers and one day at the grocery store we were in the diaper aisle and I asked my mom to buy me some Pampers and she said no, so I begged her to buy me some Pampers and she said no finally I threw a full blown temper tantrum kicking and screaming and she gave in and put a box of Pampers in the shopping cart. When we got home and brought the groceries in from the car my mom stripped off my pants and underwear and diapered me right on the kitchen floor and I wore diapers 24/7/365 until I was 10 and I loved every minute of it. Now I’m 51 and I wear diapers 24/7/365 and I still love wearing diapers and using them for their intended purpose.
Grew up a multiple times per night bedwetter. I was pinned into thick cloth diapers and pull on plastic pants every night before bed. I think by age 9 or so I had become a diaper lover and really looked forward to taking my bath and having my mom diaper me for bed. I was disappointed when I turned 13 and my mom told me to start diapering myself. I think the combination of entering puberty and having too many erections while being diapered caused my mom to stop doing it. While I loved being in diapers and waking up soaked every morning I also wanted it to stop because how many teen guys want to fear being found out as a bedwetter. When I entered high school at 14 1/2 I was allowed to decide on wearing diapers to bed. I also need to add I struggled regularly during the day with leaking, wearing multiple pairs of underwear, and often wearing plastic pants over them to protect my pants. Anyway I stopped wearing the diapers but now I was waking up soaked in the middle of the night and that was terrible. After a couple months I put myself back in my nightime diapers and have worn at night since then. 15+ years ago I got tired of daytime struggles and went to wearing disposable briefs during the day. Changing before my diapers get saturated is the only thing I have to remind myself. Other than hat I live stress free and wet most of the time. I would probably hate it but since I really like the diapers anyway, it’s ok.