For dad, diaper checks are practical, sure. But they’re also very special moments.
For myself, checking to see if a little guy is wet is a way of taking little moments in the day to get re-centered and to reaffirm to a little guy that he’s important in my life and that I’m trying my best to make sure he’s loved and cared for.
There’s something more powerful, in many ways, about a diaper check compared to, say, a kiss on the cheek. While any loving gesture is positive and affirming, there’s a communication that happens between a dad and son through a diaper check which is hard to explain or replicate through other means. But not all diaper checks are equal!
They may each have a similar result, but one of the amazing things about the diaper check is the range of ways in which they can be expressed.
The “Elaborate” Check
Recommended when it’s closing in on bath or nap time or for switching a little guy’s attention from, say, playing with his toys to cuddle time.
Daddy comes to you and gives you a little snuggle or a kiss on the cheek, and then pats your bum lightly.
Maybe making a ‘hmmm’ sound, he then says “We’d better check your diaper, little one, lie down for daddy”.
Because of your clothing, this diaper check involves a lot of snaps. As you lie on your back on the nursery rug or living area carpet, daddy undoes the snaps of your shortalls along at least one leg.
He then undoes the snaps between the legs of your onesie. Rather than simply run a finger along your leg, dad first gives the front of your diaper a little squeeze and visual check. He may also lift your legs a little to see if your the bum area also seems wet or messy.
A final check running a finger along the leg of the diaper and daddy will usually have his verdict – time for a change!
The Subtle Check (Waist)
A powerful form of the diaper check although in a subtle way. It works best when repeated over time. The point is not to draw too much attention but to make having his diapers checked a natural part of every day.
You’re playing with your toys or are intently watching cartoons. You have a warm feeling because daddy is nearby and you feel him kiss your neck or cheek lightly.
Your attention is elsewhere, but the warm feeling of daddy nearby gives you a quick little warm shiver. You sense something else – a little crinkle sound and then a warm finger along the waist of your diaper, but the feeling doesn’t quite come into focus. You’re vaguely aware that your diaper is being checked and somehow feel more reassured that you’re diapered as you should be.
The Outdoor Check
A boy doesn’t stop using his diapers just because he’s out with daddy at a mall or movie. Diaper checks in public are best combined with a ‘shirt check’.
You’re with daddy at the mall. You sometimes feel like everyone can hear the crinkle of your diapers or see the tell-tale bulge but you’re not sure.
Most of the time you’re just enjoying your time with dad and you feel like a special little boy to be out with him, having fun, going places and laughing.
Dad places his hand on your shoulder as you rush along, slowing you down as if he wants to ask you something. Then, you realize he’s giving you a little diaper check as he adjusts your shirt, slips a hand along the waist of your jeans or shorts, and then carefully pulls your shirt back down (covering, you think, your diaper).
The Night Check
Letting your little one sleep through the night in a wet diaper isn’t recommended. A late night diaper check while he’s asleep is recommended to avoid night time leaks and soaked sleepers.
You slept through the night but when you awake your diaper is merely damp. You’re sure you had the sensation of wetting yourself as you nodded off, but more often than not you’re not quite aware of wetting anymore so you’re not sure.
You remember a sort of dream. In the dream you were in your crib and daddy was changing you while you slept. He had carefully and gently taken off your wet diaper and put you in a clean one, trying not to disturb you as he took care of you. He gave a check along the leg of you diaper to make sure it felt snug before raising the bars of your crib and tip-toeing out.
As you lie in your crib you can’t help wondering whether or not the diaper check and change was a dream or not.