You’re a baby or toddler in nice clean diapers and maybe a cute pair of short-alls. You’ve spent some quality time with daddy but now he’s left you to play a little on your own – maybe ‘baby’ time with some blocks or a coloring book, or maybe more adult time on the computer or just watching TV. Daddy’s in the other room and as you sit there you start to wonder: what’s daddy thinking? What’s he doing? Is he going to forget I’m here? Is he happy to be away from me?
Being a dad to an adult baby is exhilarating, emotional, delightful, filled with routine and ritual (or surprise and excitement), and is sometimes exhausting. But if you’ve ever wondered what dad is thinking when he’s not around, I can say that you are probably not far from his thoughts.
There are probably as many emotions amongst dads to adult babies as there are amongst the little ones, and as many takes on the experiences as there are dads. For myself, the feeling is one in which a deep bond is created between dad and son (or adult/baby, parent/child): something that feels like a permanent part of my emotional make-up, whether the dad/son play lasts for a day, a weekend, or is a regular part of life.
In fact, when daddy is away from you, he probably has you in a special place right near his heart, a constant feeling of tenderness, something that he seems to carry around with him everywhere he goes. This feeling can sometimes have elements of frustration or sadness, but when a dad/son relationship is thriving it’s a gift that he cherishes having.
In fact, daddy is probably thinking specific things about you as he goes about his day, even if he’s not around. One thing is certain: if he left you diapered, he’ll be thinking about that, and whether you are being good, are using or have used your diaper, and whether you’ll need a change. Depending on the circumstances and the agreement between you and daddy, he may wonder whether you’ve changed yourself, especially if he needed to be away from the house for a while.
He’s probably also thinking about your clothing (also, again depending on circumstances, but especially if you’re a toddler or baby rather than just his diaper boy, although this can apply to the latter as well). He’s thinking about how you looked today, maybe thinking about how cute you were, and he’s wondering about a cuter outfit still! Or maybe thinking about what jammies make the most sense tonight – whether it’s cold enough out for your sleeper, or warm enough to just wear your diaper.
Daddy is probably also making plans. Time away, even for a bit, is a good chance for him to think about what baby needs, and what activities would be both fun and give a chance for you to bond with your daddy. He might be thinking of special outings – to the park, say, to play on the swings, or to a movie, or the mall to buy some new toys or necessary items for your care.
If you misbehaved, were pouty or if you acted out, daddy may be upset, but I imagine that different dads will think about this differently. Some may see a need to establish guidelines or have different forms of punishment, others may be very gentle. I think that a good dad will recognize that your actions were very natural ones for a baby or toddler, and depending on your age (or inner age, anyways) he may know that this is just a natural response to the feelings you have inside you, or it may be a more deliberate acting out which deserves a different approach. The important thing is that daddy is thinking about you not because he doesn’t love you or care about you, but because he DOES, and would be worrying about your well-being.
So while daddy is away from his little one, you’re probably on his mind, and a lot! More than anything, the bond you hopefully feel with your daddy is something that he feels as well: just as you can feel your diapers on you, he can feel you in his heart, and is aware of you inside him even when he’s not around.